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Juliet Montague

The Great Hogwarts Food Fight

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Laelia Midnight

Lia walked into the Great Hall that evening, book in hand. She had actually decided to do some homework, starting with that Potions essay. So the small brunette could be seen walking with her nose in her potions book, glancing up every now and then to make it to the Hufflepuff table unharmed.

 

Ah Sucess!

 

Lia put the book down for a few moments and began filling her plate with all her favorte foods. She was starved. So it was as she was sitting happily at the Hufflepuff table, reading her potions book and munching on her food that a small commotion started to stir at the Slytherin and Ravenclaw table.

 

Lia had been sitting with her back to the two tables and turned to see what exactly was going on only to see food began flying in all directions. Oh Merlin, she thought. Pulling out her wand, Lia moved to try and remove herself from the great hall without getting splattered with food.

 

This plan however, was a complete failure. As she grabbed her book and quickly stood up, a bowl of pudding hit her in the face. The fifth year froze. This was so not happening! Putting her book down, Lia started to wipe the pudding out of her face looking around for who had ruined her uniform. She really couldn't pin point who the culprit was and just then another bowl of some unknown contents was flying at her.

 

In a panic, Lia flicked her wand at the bowl and said a random blocking spell. Thankfully the shield saved her from the food but it also caused it to bounce back in the oppisite direction heading towards another student instead.

Edited by Laelia Midnight

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Hector Farquhar Torrent

The most sacred time Hector Farquhar Torrent had at Hogwarts was spent consuming food in the Great Hall. Unfortunately, the boy had been in the wrong place at the wrong time.

 

When the unsuspecting Gryffindor begun his dining experience, he was content with a copy of the Daily Prophet opened to the Sports Section, chicken and bread piled upon his thirsty plate. The Hall seemed as usual as it had been whenever he'd been there; there was always a humming of voices, and random calls that echoed off the walls that sounded out as students yelled to each other.

 

Something was off that day though, as the murmuring grew to a sea of yells, and it had seemed that the weather spell wore off, as little specks of moisture dotted the back of Hector's neck, and his Prophet. Just as he had taken a large bite of chicken too.

 

He realized that it wasn't rain that had hit him, in fact, it was food. A food fight had erupted and destroyed his sacred time in the Great Hall. Hector's eyes searched for the culprit. It seemed the most food pileup had accumulated around Ryu. Hector glared at him.

 

"Ryu..." Seething his hands flew to the nearest tray of chicken wings and drumsticks. "Always too rowdy..." He breathed a bit heavily as Hector retrieved his wand from his pocket, "Had to start a food fight..." Thrusting the tray up into the air, Hector shouted the very spell he'd learned in charms that week.

 

"ABLEGATIO!" An invisible force escaped his wand and hit the tray of chicken wings from below.

 

Chicken wings were flying everwhere.

 

Potato Salad then proceeded to fly into Hector's chest with a heavy force. Hector bent over clutching his potato-lathered stomach with the wind knocked out of him

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Louis Weasley-Ashcroft

Something strange was about to happen at Hogwarts. Well not that strange considering this had occurred many times before over the last three years. Louis loved eating. This was a fact known to everyone that knew him. The houselves in the kitchen knew Louis well and even had food prepared just in case they were to receive a visit. As for the great hall, the Gryffindor never missed meals not even for a date with Mallory or a duel unless food was involved.

 

Here everyone was in the great hall eating yet another scrumptious meal. There were mashed potatoes, corn, chicken, and a few other things a person would need on a nice little picnic. Taking a bit out of the chicken, Louis couldn't believe how good it was. Conversation was going on all over the Gryffindor table. Louis found himself attempting to speak to his friends while eating at the same time. This was a bit difficult considering his mouth was full and they couldn't understand him.

 

For some apparent reason, something didn't seem right. Louis was trying to pinpoint what it was when all of a sudden a loud noise erupted from the other side of the great hall. It came from the Slytherin table. Louis was always grateful that they happened to sit on the other side of the room. Thinking it was nothing; Louis continued to eat his food and conversation.

 

SPLAT!

 

Louis felt something fall onto his head. Placing his right hand onto his head, he gasped. Now his hand was full of mashed potatoes. It was then that he turned from the direction that it came from and noticed there was a food fight going on. This occurred at least once a year. Louis had managed to somehow get out of trouble all the other times so why should this time be any different. Noticing that Mallory was involved, Louis took some mashed potatoes and threw it towards the Hufflepuff table saying, "Hey Badgers! Get a load of this."

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Francis Barnes

Lies. Francis thought as a rather large glob of pudding began to slide down the side of Warren’s shield. Honestly, where were the adults? Weren’t they supposed to be bringing some sort of order to this chaos right about now? Or did they have better things to do, like teach lessons, grade, or—heaven forbid—sit back and enjoy all this misbehavior?

 

That was it. Francis was leaving Hogwarts. Normal school teachers would never allow this sort of ruckus to go down in their cafeterias, but the Hogwarts professors clearly needed to be institutionalized just as much as the students. There was no way Francis was going to stick around this place long enough to allow himself to come down with the crazy.

 

Then came the gravy.

 

With a resigned sigh, Francis wiped the sludge from his face, shaking it off his hand with a clear look of distaste. Between corridor swamps and exploding food, there was no way his robes were going to make it to the end of the year. Which was a bit of a shame, because Francis was fairly sure he wouldn’t be able to afford another set.

 

“I hate my life.” He grumbled quietly into the air before following Warren’s example and trying to cover up as much of himself as he could. This was awful. The house elves would definitely be coming after his robes again. It was as if the school tried to make the boy’s clothes filthy simply so that he would dream of flesh eating elves at night.

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Evanna Nevin

Evvie was....sort of dodging food. She was covered in almost everything that had been served today, except maybe the--oh no, there was the mustard. Icky. Evvie shivered as she wiped the mustard off on some other kid's robes. Maybe they wouldn't notice. Ah well, whether or not they would, no one could pin it on Evvie. She was actually headed to another table to throw something else that wasn't debris from another table to the Gryffindor table when she heard the familiar voices of Francis Barnes and Warren Graham.

 

"Oi, what're you two doing?" she asked, going into "mum mode." Evvie squeaked as she felt someone toss a spoon at her head. Who threw spoons during a food fight? She grabbed a handful of pudding, cringing at the soft substance running through her fingers, and throwing it in the general direction the spoon had come from.

 

"TAKE THAT!" she shouted as she chucked it. She grinned happily before lunging forward, grabbing onto the Ravenclaw table for support. Did someone just chuck a roll at her?!? Evvie spun around, trying to pinpoint the location of the thrower, totally forgetting about War and Fran.

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Aoi Bianchi
Aoi Bianchi had at some point managed to figure out one of the best ways to escape the chaos that had, seemingly entered the school, it wouldn't do for him to be found throwing food about, it would make him look bad, wouldn't it and get him in trouble, right? So he had ducked underneath the nearest table and gradually made his way for the nearest exit, however, he had one flaw in his plan... How to make it across the last yard or so of open space undetected? He was stuck.

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Evey Valentine

After taking a glorious hit to the side of her face, Evey Valentine was absolutely furious. Where were her best friends? Why weren't they flying to her defense? She withdrew her wand, casting Blocking Charms all around her. "Obsidio! Obsidio! OBSIDIO!" She kept bellowing, managing to keep her robes free of muck, 'cept for the mash potatoes and Jell-O that still littered her hair. She ducked as she made her way towards the Gryffindor table, in search for Hayley and Indiana. Surely they would help her get out of this mess alive! She cringed as other students launched food at eachother, desperately looking up and down the Gryffindor table.

 

SMACK.

 

A handful of chocolate pudding hit her right in the neck, making the Slytherin choke on air. "What the--?" she stared up at the thrower, only to find a rather furious looking brown-haired Gryffindor (Evanna Nevin), mothering Graham and some other kid she didn't know. "HEY! WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?" she yelled at her, shaking her fist for the second time that day. She immediately grabbed a fistful of Jell-O that was handy at the Gryffindor table and threw it straight at the brunette's face, the Jell-O dutifully finding it's target. "Don't mess, love," she snickered as she continued to set up Blocking Charms around her. "Obsidio! OBSIDIO! HAYLEY MARIE! INDIANIA!" she cried out, searching desperately for her friends.

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Hayley Valentine

Hayley had not been planning to attend dinner at all that night. In fact, she wasn’t even going to come down to the great hall, not feeling that hungry and too wrapped up in a new book to do much else. It also didn’t help that she had found a stash of chocolates her mother must’ve hidden all too well for her, stuffed at the very bottom of her suitcase, still waiting to be found. But she had found them, and her stomach was too filled with cocoa and hazelnut to think of filling it with much else.

 

She had told Indiana and her other three dormies to go on without her, staying snuggled up in the warmth of her cushy bed. Adrian, Lor and Barrett had left her, but Indiana had taken a bit more persuasion. She couldn’t comprehend anyone giving up a good meal, apparently. But Hayley had, more than happy to be by herself on this chill autumn day, book in hand, stomach rich and full, and then it happened.

 

Her Gryffindor senses were a tingling, signalling her from the cave of her blankets and leading her down to the great hall. She didn’t really know why she was going down at all, maybe there was some havoc going on about the mash potatoes not having enough garlic over in Slytherin, or maybe the Hufflepuffs had begun worshipping the roast lamb again—either way, Hayley Valentine entered the Great Hall, surprised that she hadn’t heard the noise beforehand, even all the way up in the Girl’s Dormitories.

 

What on earth was going on here?

 

SPLAT!

 

Just as she entered the room a bomb of mashed peas and carrots landed all over her face, painting it with an odd shade of puke; it made Hayley want to vomit. Her eyes narrowed, daring anyone to claim the guilt when they suddenly widened, bright and alert to what was happening.

 

Oh, it was a food fight. It didn’t matter! Someone still had to pay.

 

“OKAY, WHOEVER JUST DID THAT IS SO—”

 

Another splat, this time in the form cranberry sauce on her back. On her scarf. Oh. This. Meant. War.

 

Leaning over to the nearby Ravenclaw table, which was nearly empty, some poor souls hiding under the table, looking petrified, Hayley grabbed a huge handful of the mashed yams, ready to fling it at one Oliver Fulton. He still had her scarf and her shirt... and her skirt... yeah... she wasn’t getting into it. He may not have been the one to have hit her most prized possession, but it didn’t mean that she couldn’t use the Hogwarts outbreak as a means for her revenge.

 

“Hayley Marie!” She spun, the use of her middle name sending shock down her spine and into her arms—

 

And straight into the face of one Evey Valentine: second cousin, best friend and extremely unamused.

 

Yep, this was war.

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Julian Trice

He hadn’t even been there to lounge and assert his new found powers as prefect. He’d been there looking for food. Kabobs more like. A sudden craving for the meat on a stick had brought him round to the great hall in search of….meat on a stick. Which was probably funny to someone somewhere but there’s no time for that. Had been about to take a seat at his house table when all hell, literally began to break loose.

 

Rice and chicken and random corn cobs began soaring overhead of heir own accord and Julian turned around, a terse ‘what the flipping HELL?!’ on the tip of his tongue when he saw the little stain Ryu Takeda heave a bowl of something and Julian turned back in time to see that the little punks intended trajectory was going straight for Juliet Rosier.

 

Oh Juliet….even when he was ticked off with her, she still managed to stop all coherent thought. Not that he had any coherent anything going for him. Bet on that.

 

It shouldn’t have bothered him one bloody bit. Especially since he’d thought of smashing the blonde with numerous things at her scandalous treatment of him as of late…but he’d be damned if Takeda (who’d be getting his sooner rather than later) got to her before he did. The tosser.

 

He didn’t even think about how ridiculous and Gryffindor he looked. Was just on one side of the table one minute, and next to her in five seconds flat, his fingers curling around her upper arm as he made to yank her out of the way. It wouldn’t do to have her face smashed in by a poorly made ceramic bowl, now would it?

 

This act of heroism would have all gone well and good if not for the fact that the place he’d decided to step left absolutely no traction for his shoes and without any grace at all, the one arm not gripping Juliet wind milled and he fell back, bringing the girl with him to the hard stone floor. Something squishy cushioning his fall but not by much.

 

Julian turned his head slightly to find that he’d landed in the remnants of the chocolate pudding missile. Broken crockery framing his head in a sort of halo. The worst sort of blasphemy to hear other people tell it. And that’s when he noticed there was something over him.

 

They really needed to stop meeting like this. Well, landing like this. It was awkward and itchy in the way rashes in not so nice places were. Had him going cross-eyed and red in the face for all of five seconds and then kind of loopy because it immediately brought to mind the summer past. Her grinning up at him, actually happy to see him…her fingers in his hair as she kissed him back oh Merlin….and she was wearing that lip shimmer he remembered. This was for all intents and purposes a very bad scene. Or a good one if she'd just...let him get on with it.... Especially as Takeda’s pudding toss hadn’t missed her at all, for a smear of the sweet dessert had splattered across her face, matting a strand of hair to her cheek and Julian was transfixed.

 

His hands moving of their own accord to brush and thus smear more chocolate over her pale skin, trying to push her hair behind her ear. Outright war raged overhead, so many things left unsaid since the first day of school and that Evie incident and he was laying over the food strewn floor staring like some love sick crup at her sparkling lips. What the hell was his malfunction?

 

“You’ve got something….” he brought a hand to her cheek, knuckles grazing over the smear of chocolate in a light caress that was completely uncharacteristic to him. “just there…” he managed to say as an exploding foil wrapped pack of….tuna surprise (hold the actual tuna) fell next to them.

Edited by Julian Trice

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Calla Sorensen

Okay, who had decided that this food fight thing was a good idea? Calla had no idea where and when exactly it had started (though the first commotion seemed to have come from the Slytherin table) but it was going to end. Right. Now. She was not happy at having gravy smeared all over her back, not at all. And even less happy that she had no idea who had thrown it. Except that it seemed to have come from the direction of the green and silver.

 

She would have gone over there and given them a piece of her mind. Really. She just needed to grow some guts first. But for one thing, one of her housemates had started to busy themselves trying to clean her up and it took several minute to extract herself from the older girl and make it clear that she was not a baby and didn’t need to have her nappy changed, thank you very much. Secondly, someone from the Gryffindor table had just decided that mashed potatoes seemed like a good addition to her gravy. Which she wouldn’t have objected to if they were on a plate in front of her. She doubted, however, that anyone wanted to eat them off her robes.

 

“Alright, you asked for it.” She said to nobody in particular, drawing her wand like quite a few people around her. Nobody would know that it was her casting spells outside of class, right? They’d be too busy cleaning up the mess anyway. “Flipendo!” She said, carefully aiming the jinx at a bowl of soup on the Slytherin table that proceeded to splash over the people sitting near it. “Flipendo!” She cried again, this time aiming in the direction of the Gryffindor table. She didn’t know what was in the bowl she’d just made to explode over there, but it looked icky.

 

Not wanting to get caught in any retaliation attacks, Calla quickly dived under the Hufflepuff table, hoping to escape to the door unharmed.

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Indiana Hainsworth

Food, oh how boring it could be when it wasn't sweet or chocolately. Indiana brushed her fork through a little pile of peas, staring disgustedly at their green color. They were so round, so boring, so small, so healthy.. yes, Indiana did recognize they were labeled as healthy, thus that was why she found them so unappealing. From time to time, she found herself lost in chatter, whether it be with her friend Hayley, her dorm mates, or some person of random.

 

Then, as everyone knows, everything changed.

 

It was like a war, or an explosion. Noise began to rise, voices began to increase, everything really just became inflamed with.. food. At first Indiana had thought there was some massive crisis happening at Hogwarts, but instead, she found herself hit with soup. Yes, soup! The bowl didn't arrive with it, having landed on the floor before the actual things inside splattered into her hair and onto her freckles.

 

"YUCK!" Indiana squealed, touching her hair (despite it tasted mighty fine) and glanced at Hayley. She had food on her too! Oh, Indi knew what this was. No longer was her expression confused and full of disgust, but rather mischievous and excited. The Great Hall was having a food fight. Suddenly, as she heard a familiar voice yell through the crowd as Indiana threw her disgusting peas at a Slytherin boy while a chicken wing flung at her face. "Obsidio!"

 

"INDIANIA!" It was Evey! And it felt like a repeat of the first night of Hogwarts all over again. Finding Hayley and Evey near the Gryffindor table, nearly right beside her. Smirking, Indiana grabbed her pumpkin juice and dumped it over the both of them.

 

"Gotcha!" She cried triumphantly, as she ran over to stand on the Hufflepuff table, holding their bowl of pudding in her hands, flinging glops of it at random suspects. She felt superior on the table and she was flinging pudding - that was really all that mattered to Indiana during this fight.

 

Then jumping down from the Hufflepuff table, she ran down the line of some and figured this was a safer tactic than letting herself be so vulnerable up from above. She kept ducking rather than using 'Obsidio' to defend herself, and as she ran, you could hear an ickle, triumphant cry...

 

"THIS. IS. HOGWARTS!!" (300 reference, so sue me.)

 

( Ignore how horribly written it is :3 )

Edited by Indiana Hainsworth

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Allyson Fox

Ally was on her way to the great hall to get some food. She didnt know were any of her friends were, and honestly she didnt care. Ally paused in the hallway for a minute wait she didnt have any friends. unless you count that girl Livi. Hey she was cool and they did chill in her fort together. Maybe they were friends. Ally pondered the possiblitiy of the thought. She arrived to the great hall and mechanically took a plate and a fork and started to grab food from the gryffindor table. She finally filled her plate up, it had mashed potatoes, gravy, lots of gravy, some salad and dressing, soup chicken rice it was all there.

 

Ally was trying to make her way to the end of the table so she could sit down. God damn people, Ally thought to herself. Everywhere theres people after people after god damn people. She sat down only to have a handful of pudding thrown through the air at her. "What the bloody hell." Ally screamed. voices started rising. Food started flying. Ally had a good idea. she took a piece of the chicken and was thankful that she grabbed the drumstick. having the drumstick in one hand, she used her other hand to fling the plate filled with food through the air.

 

She munched on the chicken as she watched the mashed potatoes seperate fromthe rice and land on a poor older boy at the ravenclaw table. She heard people yelling all over the place. This was a legit food fight. Just like in muggle schools there is no teams. Its everyone for themself.

 

Ally took a cup and filled it up with some pumpkin juice. She took a big gulp and then sprayed the rest out of the cup and into the massive group of people. Ally finished eating the chicken and with a giant swing she threw it the the air " HEADS UP!!!" Ally screamed to no one.

 

Ally made her way towards the big bowl of rice and filled a tinier bowl. taking a spoon the began walking around eating the rice. She would participate in this food fight but she was damn right going to eat some food too. She spun around fast and ended up losing the balance on the bowl of rice. It flew out of her hand and collide with someone who was walking past her. "Mah bad," Ally mumbled to the kid. she hoped he wouldnt mind she really did. But hey who cares its a food fight. she was a mess she had food clinging to her everywhere. The gravy and soup were the worse though.

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Juliet Montague

This may just be the crowning moment of Juliet Rosier's life.

 

Pointing across the hall at Takeda's back, Juliet doubled over with the force of her laughter, her whole body actually shaking with the force of it. It had been the stuff legends were made of. One minute he was sat there, innocently eating his sandwich, then the Banishing Charm had clipped the back of his head and his face had been banished into his sandwich. A sandwich which had then exploded absolutely everywhere and made it kind of hard for her to breathe.

 

Miles was wailing at Ryu, attempting to stop what was obviously going to be full-on war, and Juliet flicked her wand at a nearby salad bowl, banishing it in his direction. "Ablegatio! Oh, live a little, Weber!" she called, seconds before Ryu declared war, and the Great Hall erupted in chaos.

 

She would have stood a chance against the chocolate pudding if she hadn't been asphyxiating with laughter at Takeda's utter fail, but as it was, she was a perfect target until fingers wrapped around her arm, making her pulse jump, and she was yanked bodily out of the way of the projectile, before her daring 'rescuer' toppled over, taking her with him. Letting out a shriek that could have been laughter or annoyance, as Evie started trying to Accio food and the Head Boy was completely useless at attempting to stop the war, Juliet found herself pulled down onto a warm... firm... body.... What?

 

It was such an absurd situation that she just stared down at him, at the chocolate pudding smeared over the stone floor, mixed in with crockery and globs of mashed potato and how blue his eyes were and she'd never noticed, and the way he was just staring right back. They could have been the only two people in the whole world at that moment, as war raged above them, someone overturning a jug of sticky pumpkin juice, the shrieks and spells and laughter just a faint buzzing noise in the background.

 

His hand lifted in the air between them, reaching out between them, and she felt warm skin brush against hers, making her flinch for a second, as if she'd been expecting something else, something other than softness and gentleness and a look in his eyes she'd never seen before. Then there was an explosion as the world reasserted itself around them, and she pulled her head back, away from his hand.

 

"Don't," she stated, and reached up to scrub at - the chocolate? - the feeling he'd left behind? - on her cheek, trying to get rid of the feeling. And then it all came rushing back; the sound of the food fight around them, the confusion at not knowing what he wanted and the summer that had been so fun and then the way he'd gone and ruined it all by snogging Evie and not really caring about her at all. "You're such a prat!" she exploded finally, reaching out and shoving his chest. "An annoying, egotistical, self-centred prat!"

 

Looking around, her eyes suddenly landed on the mess on the floor next to them and she scooped a handful of it up, mushing it into his hair with one hand as she used the other to push herself up, off him. Letting out a frustrated sound, she turned and stormed off, blasting a nearby bowl of soup across the room with another "Ablegatio!" ... "Ablegatio! Ablegatio! Ablegatio!"

 

There was nothing like a little misplaced anger in the afternoon to get your blood boiling.

Edited by Juliet Rosier

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Emmeline Brisk

Sitting in front of a bowl of tomato soup and a grilled cheese sandwich, Emmeline propped open the book she had borrowed from the library. She usually enjoyed reading while she ate, and Weird Wizarding Dilemmas and Their Solutions had sounded like it would be an interesting read. As she dunked her sandwich in her soup and started to read the first page, she noticed a little noise coming from the Slytherin table.

 

"Goodness, the Great Hall seems noisier than usual today!" she said to the person sitting next to her, and went back to reading. The next thing she knew, mashed potatoes were raining down on her. She looked around and noticed food flying EVERYWHERE. Someone had started a food fight, and here was poor Emmeline in the middle of it all. She looked down at the library book in front of her, and noticed a large blob of something green and gooey.

 

"NO!" she shrieked. She tried to find a napkin to wipe the goo off the book, seeing as the book wasn't hers, and she didn't want the librarians to harbor any prejudices against her for messing up their books. However, there was chaos erupting all around her, and there weren't any clean napkins to be found. Something landed with a great SPLASH in Emmeline's bowl of soup, splashing soup all over the front of her shirt.

 

Everyone around her seemed to be flinging food in all directions, and soon there were peas in her hair and noodles clinging to her robes. There had to be some way to keep from getting covered in goop and mush... Emmeline whipped the wand out of her pocket. The blocking charm might do the trick!

"Obsidio!"

 

But then something hit her from behind. Grabbing her library book, she held it over the top of her head and ran. A Gryffindor girl flung some chocolate pudding just as she ran past. Emmeline grabbed a bowl of lima beans from the table nearby and tossed them in the air as she ran past the assailant.

 

The Great Hall had become quite glorious in its chaos and disorder. Emmeline was amazed to see it so alive, but she was more concerned with the library book, and her own personal cleanliness to join in any further. She preferred to watch it from afar.

Edited by Emmeline Brisk

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June Pachinko Johnson

June had been considering practicing meditation this year.

 

With her badge had been awarded certain responsibilites. Like being the best she could be (though she was already the best), and behaving in such a way as to be an example for the younger students (she thought she was already a pretty good example, too), and being patient with idiots (...).

 

So it was that last one she needed work on. There was just something about a fool like Julian that drove her up out of her seat with the desire to use her fist to make his nose an INNY instead of an OUTTY. It was awfully uncontrollable, really, so she had high hopes about this whole meditation thing. Maybe, at last, she'd be free of that desperate, VIOLENT drive to break his teeth. --er, their teeth. Idiots.

 

She'd been sitting rather calmly in the Great Hall then, reading a book on the visualization tactics of deep meditation, and the lotus chants, etc., eating a toasted bagel even though it was lunch time which seemed sort of strange to her, but no matter. Recently she'd taken it upon herself to keep a watchful eye on her house ickles, partly because it seemed like the majority of them were getting more Hufflepuffier (and therefore more vulnerable to Slytherin attack) every year.

 

As she flipped another page of the book carefully, she settled down to read another paragraph about the calm stillness, the removal from the world, the serene--

 

Something exploded in her face.

 

It smelled like fish.

 

It was all over her book.

 

She grit her teeth and stood up abruptly, glanced across the table, where an admittedly adorable little boy was spewing out insipidly adorable apologies to the girl next to him.

 

WHAT ABOUT JUNE, BOY?

 

JUNE GOT TUNA-SURPRISED TOO.

 

She took a deep breath. Calm. Must remain calm. Think oceans and mountains and lotus blossoms floating atop mirror-flat ponds. June screwed her eyes shut and began muttering to herself. "Om mani padme hum, om mani padme hum, om--"

 

The sounds of more splatter preceded the sudden weight against her legs of someone diving under the Ravenclaw table for cover, knocking her feet right out from under her and causing her to crumple face-first into a half-eaten pie.

 

OH A PIE HAHA NICE GAG.

 

June reared back quickly, the cream and crumbs dripping off her twitching face. "CLOD OF WAYWARD MARL!" she roared, and immediately took her anger out on the poor little boy across from her, reaching over and grasping him by the hair to pull his cute little face down into what was left of his food. --sorry, Archie.

 

However, when Alec stood up and attempted to stop what had suddenly, inexplicably, become a full-out food fight, she sheepishly released Archie and patted down her robes and wiped the cream off her face. Right, she was a prefect. She was supposed to be above all this. She was supposed to STOP this.

 

Someone poured orange juice down the back of her blouse and she screeched, scrambling out of her seat and howling, "WHO DID THAT?" However, in her hurry, her mary-jane shoes slipped on the rest of the spill, and she happened to fall right on her arse.

 

Thankfully, no one was watching.

 

Except Shakespeare, who happened to cry one single, glistening tear for her wounded pride from where he lived in the clouds.

 

June got to her feet, grumbling, and ducked a flying bowl of peas. "Ravenclaws, get under the table with the first few ninnies that found their way under there!" she called out to her little housemates. "You can't afford to get hit in your BRILLIANT MINDS!"

 

She, on the other hand, was gunna track down whoever started this whole thing. And yes, she was going to completely ignore her own part in it.

 

At least she was going to until she saw, lying on the floor near the Slytherin table, Julian with... Juliet Rosier? What the bloody hell? When had Juliet's eyes bled out? Because obviously no girl in her right mind would actually tolerate lying on top of him for... well... as long as she was! Fifteen seconds was far too long! (She knew, she'd sorta been there, much against BOTH their wills).

 

"You're such a prat! An annoying, egotistical, self-centred prat!"

 

Juliet's vehement words and shoving at, yes, the PRAT, made June rather giddy. She laughed, and would have laughed longer and harder if she hadn't been hit in the head with an apple.

 

YES.

 

AN APPLE.

 

APPLE'S AREN'T SOFT.

 

UNLESS THEY'RE ROTTEN.

 

YOU DISGUST ME, PERSON-WHO-THREW-THE-NOT-ROTTEN-APPLE.

 

She hissed and rubbed her skull, then picked up the apple and stomped right over to her most hated enemy in the world EVER. And she smirked right down at him, where he was still lying on his back, looking unusually vulnerable--belly-up, yes, but his expression, there was something different about it as well, after Juliet had rejected his touch.

 

"'You are no less than a stuffed man'," she quoted, with a triumphant grin she couldn't help at seeing him so unexpectedly downtrodden. "And you fail at life if even the girls from YOUR house want nothing to do with you."

 

Feeling cocky, she held the apple out over his head and added, "Wake up, Trice. This is real life, where you're a prat, where there's girls you'll never get, and gravity."

 

And then she dropped it.

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Declan Roberts

The residents of Hogwarts had always been close to insanity in Declan’s mind, but now they had pushed right over the edge. Was it up to him to put a call in to an asylum and get them shepherded off to the funny-farm by men in white coats? Clinging to the bench on which he sat with incredible force, the Ravenclaw’s saucer-wide eyes flew across the ridiculous food fight that was spanning all four tables.

 

I mean, seriously, it was like they were a bunch of kids.

 

“Stop it!” he yelled at a nearby girl who was spending her time smashing one of the perfect pies into pieces. Declan mourned over the mushy remains, his inner-chef distraught and indignant. These people had no appreciation for the work that had gone into these superb offerings. He should educate them all. “Now look here, put that down” he insisted, grabbing the free end of a dish and preventing some over-excited boy from chucking it into someone’s face.

 

Something collided with the back of his head, and Dec gave a shriek and hopped about, tousling his hair to try and get it out. He extracted a handful of sauce-covered spaghetti and flung it angrily at the back of the nearest person partaking in this atrocity. “Take that, ye barmy fool” he yelled at them crossly.

 

And then the spells started flying to aid the mess, because people really wanted a mass detention

 

Spluttering incoherently, Declan took the shouted advice of crazy-prefect and flung himself onto all fours, crawling under the Ravenclaw table. “Excuse me, coming through” he called, moving up the table towards the exit. “Hi Fran” he greeted as he squeezed past, noting his dorm mate and sounding like the whole situation was nothing out of the ordinary. It was scary how quickly this was all becoming expected decorum.

 

Food fell in front of him and Dec slipped to a halt, scrambled back a few steps and took up place near the rest of the ninnies briefly before managing to dash out of the door. Hopefully this wouldn't leave him scarred enough to take up scrounging for berries in the grounds instead of going into the hall to eat.

Edited by Declan Roberts

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Alkeen Flingh

Alkeen was on a mission. He had strange visions about this day. With the thoughts of this very date playing through his mind he couldn't help but wander into the Great Hall that day. Even if he was wrong no one would care. Its not as if he was making any signs that he believed anything would happen. Until he grabbed a bowl of fresh tomato soup and began commando crawling under the Gryffindor table.

 

Right on que the fight began as the red lion of Gryffindor draped down onto Alkeens long messy hair. How could he tell? Simple there was food flying about and mad shouting. Time for some armour. Alkeen loved dressing up. Although he didn't like much to share that with his fellow housemates.

 

In almost a gladiator style Alkeen sprant to the Huffelpuff table picking up large serving plate which he strapped to his chest with the smallest piece of string, which he had weirdly found in his pocket. Next a neat sliding tackle under the "Puff" table proved the wrong idea as Alkeen smashed into a hard wooden ledge. Bad idea.

 

Alkeen less agile rose to his feet grabbing yet another steel plate, but instead this time, he strapped it to his wrist, all the while still balancing in one hand his ammo. (Tomato Soup) Thankfully the shield proved helpful as Alkeen rolled under the next table, which was of course the Ravenclaws. If it wasn't for his metal protection the magical shield that protected two cowering boys covered in gravy would have sent him flying. Merlin must have been looking upon Alkeen though.

 

He luckily hadn't been hit by anything yet and he wasn't taking his chances. With this in mind Alkeen swiftly leapt onto the Ravenclaw table and clinched a metal pan, thrusting it upon his face. The neat piece of armor protected him enough to not be harmed. Then target spotted. Locked and loaded.

 

Alkeen sped across the pebbled ground and onto the Slyth table. Then with a lift of his arm the young blondes tomato soup was heading straight for Juliets face. It was her who caused it after all, this food fight. She deserved it most. Alkeen couldn't stop laughing, which was when he saw a Ravenclaw prefect bullying it seemed a Slytherin. Now Alkeen had learnt to stay away from the snakes in his three years at Hogwarts, but he couldn't help but feel a sense of sorrow for the young lad who had been bombarded with a rock hard apple.

 

As Juliet dripped with creamy soup Alkeen grabbed a baguette still sporting his cool armor and shouted,

 

"HEY PLAY NICE PREFECT!"

 

When the girl turned it was simple. A thrust to the stomach them SLAM! around the girls head and she was gone. On her arse and ever so slightly dazed. Alkeen the Great had one. Now to bostler his armor and army before he got killed. With a lift of his makeshift visor and a wink of his left eye Alkeen held his hand out to the vunerable Slyth.

 

"You shouldn't stand for that mate. Stupid bugger she was! Names Alkeen. Alkeen Flingh. Nice to meet you. Now I'm sure that prefect won't be too happy with me when she gets up so fancy joining my army? You get free armor!"

 

Alkeen hastily put together a new suit for his latest recruit. Hopefully it held out long enough for the wrath of a Ravenclaw and maybe even a side order of angry Slyth!

 

 

OOC: Permission to Godmode June and I am terribly sorry for my mistakes in this piece especially to Juliet.

Edited by Alkeen Flingh

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Mrs Norris

It was only days after the mess in the Great Hall during the Sorting and Mrs. Norris was loathe to enter the cursed room again, but as she prowled closer towards it, she could hear the sounds of a big ruckus coming from within. A big ruckus usually meant runts doing things they shouldn't do which meant runts getting into trouble which meant runts getting punished and runts getting punished was exactly what the cat lived for. She just couldn't pass up this opportunity to see some detention action!

 

The cat carefully snuck into the Great Hall, though judging by the loud din, there really was no need for her to sneak. The sight that beheld her eyes was shocking at best. It was a mess inside! Food was everywhere, flying, splatting, spilling, and what not. The cat tried to narrow her red eyes to focus on a specific perpetrator, but they were all moving so fast and the food was coming from every direction. Didn't these miscreants know that food fights were against the rules?! ISOLENT WRETCHES.

 

After last year's experience, though, the cat thought better than to get herself involved until a big two-legger came along. Last year, she had nearly gotten slopped on with orange juice and was only saved because she was standing near the Head Boy who had neatly shielded both of them. The entirely disgraceful part of this year's fight was that prefects AND the Head Boy were either ignoring the situation, egging it on, or even participating! They were supposed to be setting the example, enforcing the rules, these special runts! RULES. What happened to following them?!

 

Mrs. Norris tried to yowl, hiss, growl, anything to get anyone's attention. Unfortuantely, she was just one scrawny, hateful cat and the midgets couldn't hear her anyways. The delinquents were getting their way and no one was stopping them (well, not unless they got near her-she was sure to scratch viciously then). Where was her beloved pet?

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Ali Killingsworth

At least the food here was good. That was one thing that Ali would admit, especially since her mom was no longer around. The best part was probably the sheer amount of food around. Whenever she was hungry, there was food! The Great Hall would easily become her favorite place right about now, even with all the people that seemed to be there all the time.

 

The Great Hall was especially full right now, since class had just gotten out and it was dinner time. The Hufflepuff sat alone at their house table and eagerly scooped a pile of potatoes onto her plate. Looking about, she grabbed a few pork chops and some salad to finish off her dinner plate. With all the right dressing and a bit of pumpkin juice (something she wasn't entirely fond of, but working on liking), Ali was prepared to begin eating her dinner. In fact, her stomach was growling, and lunch seemed like it was hours away.

 

She picked up her fork, laden with potatoes, bringing it to her mouth, right when she was hit in the head. Shocked, the little Hufflepuff looked up, across the room, where a group of students were beginning to throw food all about the Great Hall. Gingerly, she touched her hair, which was now sticky with the exact same type of potatoes that were about to go into her mouth.

 

Ali was aghast. The clean, organized, respectful little girl had just been hit in the head by a garnish. Her plate now had a roll splattered atop it, and her dinner was officially ruined, even though she was starving. The blonde began to look about the Great Hall at the chaos, and decided to better her odds by leaving the hall and heading back to her Common Room to clean up. Unlucky for her, she was pelted by at least three other entrees before exiting.

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Nymphana

Nymphana usually avoided the Great Hall.

 

The portrait was hardly the one to blame. After the incident a few years back what with the poking, burning and other things Nymphana cared not to mention, she was basically boycotting the Great Hall. Not that it mattered much, because Nymphana didn't consume human food, but nevertheless, SHE WAS BOYCOTTING IT AND THAT WAS THAT. End of discussion. (Unfortunately, the humans had been much less enthusiastic to join in her protest as they had insisted that they needed that foolish thing they called 'food'. Ugh.)

 

In short, Nymphana kept her fair and fine distance from the Great Hall, the Great Hall kept a fair and fine distance from Nymphana, and the humans continued stuffing their faces despite her complaints. While everything was, of course, being fair and fine, Nymphana found that she had left her coral hairbrush...in the Entrance Hall. Normally, Nymphana didn't venture down there as it was too close to said Great Hall, for reasons already clarified. However, that was her favorite and only hairbrush, and to loose it would just be too big of a tragedy.

 

Of course, then, this conclusion required her to come within five feet of the doors to the Great Hall, and that was about when the noise caught up to her frame. Being a particularly focused creature (the word arrogant shall not be used, so that Nymphana's dainty ears might be kept pure), Nymphana could quite honesty and sincerely say that the commotion disinterested her as much as most things not pertaining to her did. In fact, she might have left just as quickly as she came with her comb if a droplet of food had not flown out of the Hall and hit her tail.

 

The frame she was currently inhabiting was not her frame, and certainly none of her concern, but what did concern her (quite heavily) was the spot of food poisoning the spot where her beautiful tail sat glimmering in the water scene. The spot was particularly inconvenient for the inhabitants of the Great Hall, mainly because the aforementioned atrocity called for immediate action on her part--hence her rare venturing into the Hall of Doom.

 

Of course--A food fight. Nymphana knew that stupid sloppish object would cause trouble eventually. It was just so unnecessary. The humans had to learn to face the facts-- Really, Nymphana had gone without it since she was first painted, and she had never felt a craving for it yet. She also quite liked it that way. But since it was zooming past her at alarming speeds, she decided to address the offending sloppish object, since one just splashed onto her frame yet again.

 

"LOOK AT MY TAIL, PUDGY DRAWINGS. LOOK AT IT!" Actually, her tail was unblemished since she moved to a new picture, but that wasn't the point. "TARNISHED, RUINED, SPITED, SMOTHERED! SMEARED ON AND MOCKED! TARNISHED AND FOULED, YOU UGLY EXCUSES FOR THREE-DIMENSIONAL SHAPES, I'LL HAVE YOU PINNED UP AND PELTED WITH SLOP, AND YOU SEE JUST HOW LONG YOUR SO-CALLED SOPHISTICATED 'MULTI-DIMENSIONAL' FORMS HOLD UP!"

 

(OOC: Feel free to be the person who flung the food that hit her frame. :))

Edited by Nymphana

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Indiana Hainsworth

It was chaos, absolute chaos!

 

And Indiana couldn't have been happier. Living in chaos was an absolute dream to her! What with apples flying toward people, (Really? Apples?), chicken wings soaring into the air of the Great Hall ceiling and tumbling one down in bouncy jiggles. The wonder of this particular food fight was that whenever people ran out of food, they immediately refilled with food due to the magical enchantment, so there was never any lack of ammo. This helped Indiana greatly as she flung chocolate pudding at people from left to right.

 

As she passed a Hufflepuff girl and flung the pudding at her, the girl in response flung lima beans at her.

 

"EWW! LIMA BEANS! I'VE BEEN HIT!" Indiana screamed dramatically, diving onto the floor, sliding her bowl of chocolate pudding into the foot of some random student. She covered her head as she slid on the floor, then ducked beneath the bench of the Ravenclaw table. However, as she grabbed her bowl of chocolate pudding that she had thrown in order to slide, she stood back up and began to throw it and people. From her friends, her acquaintances, to older students who would probably nomomom her to death. As she then threw her hand back, she gave a huge throw in the direction of a rather gawky looking Ravenclaw, but instead hit a portrait of a mermaid.

 

Indiana would have barely given the mermaid picture another glance, figuring it would just clean itself or something, but instead, she got an earful from the mean blonde portrait. As Indi looked back at it, she noticed it had moved to another portrait and her tail was unblemished. Drama Queen! (Much like Indi, hmm?)

 

"LOOK AT MY TAIL, PUDGY DRAWINGS. LOOK AT IT!" The portrait yelled, as Indiana cocked her head to the side, giggling with food dripping down her hair and cheeks. "TARNISHED, RUINED, SPITED, SMOTHERED! SMEARED ON AND MOCKED! TARNISHED AND FOULED, YOU UGLY EXCUSES FOR THREE-DIMENSIONAL SHAPES, I'LL HAVE YOU PINNED UP AND PELTED WITH SLOP, AND YOU SEE JUST HOW LONG YOUR SO-CALLED SOPHISTICATED 'MULTI-DIMENSIONAL' FORMS HOLD UP!" Still, Indiana laughed in response, not feeling very apologetic to such a pretty loud mermaid. Especially because she couldn't harm her. She held up the chocolate pudding bowl, raising her eyebrows.

 

"You can't pin me up! So nah-nah-nah-nah-nah-nah!" She teased, tossing the bowl in front of the portrait before eyeing someone about to fling carrots at her, (Ew!), and then pointed her wand. "Obsidio!" She then looked at the angry portrait. "Ta! Oh, wait!" She then flung some more chocolate pudding on the mermaid's tail. "It looks sweeter that way! You silly little portrait!" Indiana teased, as she ran back into the fight, feeling better after defeating a fight with.. what.. a portrait? Oh you're tough, Ms. Hainsworth.

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Astrid McManus

Okay, so maybe it wasn't the best idea to participate in a food fight, but when in Rome.... It seemed there was enough chaos and enough food hitting her and everyone else by this point, that Astrid figured that if... when this debacle was brought to a screeching halt, she at least wouldn't be singled out as a particular troublemaker.

 

Probably best to put away the wand, though. Yep. And this was reinforced by the Head Boy apparently with some fixation on his sandwich yelling something to that effect just before getting a faceful of mashed potatoes. At least she'd gotten some girl really good with the Jello bomb--some Slytherickle was running around torturing people and looking like something out of the lake. Astrid realized belatedly that a good portion of gravy was running down the side of her face and this set her off laughing in a half-insane cackle. "You'll never take me alive!!" she bellowed giddily, dodging a half eaten meat pie that was dripping its way past her at speed.

 

She didn't have time to see what happened next to the green-dripping girl because suddenly the kid (whose Tuna Surprise had gone kersplat) had his face driven into the mashed remains of said Surprise. "HEEYYYY!" she yelled, and in her indignation didn't realize she was yelling at the notorious June Pachinko Johnson, Prefect kthx, who most probably didn't know her but of course she knew June because June pwns. :wub: But with the quantity of food covering even the air, recognition was delayed and so she yelled.

 

"HEEEEYY! YOU LEAVE THAT KID ALONE, SEA HAG-- um, Ms. Prefect," she amended in horror as she spotted the telltale badge.

 

At least June had already started yelling in general, so perhaps Astrid was in the clear. Unless June was like an elephant, who never forgot. That would most certainly be bad! She lobbed a hearty handful of mac n' cheese then decided to take the wise Prefect's advice and dove under the table. It would have perhaps been heroic to have shielded the Tuna Surprise kid, but hey--it was every witch for herself in the event of a food fight.

 

And she had gravy in her hair for Merlin's sake!

 

She did, however, yank on the hem of the kid's robes, trying to encourage him to do the same. "Hey guys," she added, grinning gravily at the kids already amassed there.

 

((edit: punctuation :blush:))

Edited by Astrid McManus

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Evey Valentine

"Oh HAYLES, THANK MERL--"

 

SPLAT.

 

"WHAT IN THE WORLD DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" She shrieked, brushing the yams off her sweater vest. "HAYLEY THOSE WERE NEW AND--" As her best friend approached her, a look of worry and amusement in her eyes. She never noticed how identical the two Valentines' eyes were...yet how different they were in personality and possibly everything else. "Man, I would kill you for that if I didn't know you sucked so much at dueling," she snickered, brushing the last piece of yam off. "Obsidio! I reckon you know how to cast a Blocking Charm?" she asked her irritably as she blocked an incoming sandwich from hitting her smack dab on the face. "C'mon let's get out of here before--"

 

AGAIN? PUMPKIN JUICE?

 

"INDIANA UHH..." Evey sputtered, trying to figure out what her middle name was. She stared at her best friend, hoping for an answer, only to find her drenched in pumpkin juice as well. She doubled over in laughter, especially at the look at her face. "YOU'RE. FACE. ME. DYING," She managed in between laughs. "OBSIDIO!" She cried, protecting her and her best friend from some red Jell-O heading their way. She tugged her best friend and waved at Indi, who was having fun harassing a certain portrait, and dragged her to the entrance of the Great Hall. "Seriously, I'm going to bathe for--ARGH!" She tripped over a certain cat, sprawled on the floor. "Stupid, stupid cat!" she yelled, looking around for the culprit. She was face to face with the infamous Mrs. Norris, praying to Merlin that Filch wasn't around to catch her calling her names.

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Jaedon Sylvertongue

Jae entered the Great Hall and stopped dead in his tracks. Yea, sure he'd heard the extra noise coming from the room as he'd approached just a few minutes later than normal, but he'd just figured there had been a few first years that were being overly enthusiastic about something - anything - whatever it was that made first years overjoyous - Jae didn't recall that anymore. So entering and finding a massive food fight going on was quite the surprise to say the least. Quite a disappontment as well - now he'd missed out on half the fun and who knew how much longer this could go on before things were brought to an abrupt halt by some spoilsport of a Professor.

 

Slipping through to the Slytherin Table (somewhat literally this time mind you) Jae managed to dodge most food items on his way, though a roll of some sort did bounce off his noggin, and arrived just as Juliet was smushing some tuna mystery meat all over Julian's head and storming off.

 

"A Prat, is it Julian? And just what brought that on mate?" Jae asked as he slid into the spot recently vacated by Juliet. He of course knew that Juliet had a fiery temper - he'd just been privledged (lucky?) enough to avoid it's wrath in the six months or so that they'd dated. "And what started this - how's a guy to eat lunch in here anyway?" All the plates were either emptied, presumably for ammo, or had other foods sprayed and splashed across them. Well, might as well join 'em if eating wasn't really an option. Hm - or he could do what Evie was doing - Ewwww - no thanks!

 

Ooooh - a fruit bowl with some nice ripe - very ripe! - plums. Perfect. Throwing them at the back of Ryu's head was really tempting, but it was a bit difficult to see just where he was sitting with the food flying. Well, he'd just have to launch them and hope for the best. So he made a sort of ramp with a flipped over serving tray and launched them across the room to land where they would. They'd be hard pressed to link them to him he hoped. "Flipendo!" A series of spells launched a flury of the moist, juicy, squishy fruits into parabolic trajectories. Oops - too soft too - they were spinning off bits and pieces as they flew. Oh well.

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Hector Farquhar Torrent

Quickly his target of Ryu was shown as faulty. He was definitely not the only supporter of this chaos -- and it was definitely not his fault. As Ryu Takeda was not flining bits of fruit, potatoes, bread, and various other puddings onto Hector's face and stomach.

 

As he recovered from the potatoes that knocked the wind out of him earlier, Hector grabbed his wand. The adrenaline rush of the whole situation had faded away, and Hector slid down to the ground with his head leaning on a bench. Within two seconds his face was covered in white-green goup that reeked slightly of lettuce and fruit punch. He grimaced and wiped it out of his face.

 

"MMphnnooooo!" He shouted, trembling as he got up. "NNNNNOOOOO! OBSIDO OBSIDO OBSIDO!" Hector Farquhar Torrent had gone completely insane. He had been covered in too much food for one day, and it was begginning to mold onto his face and legs and stuff. Yeah. It wasn't exactly the most fun he'd had since he went to the circus with Brittney Spears. He'd just got splattered by different liquid there.

 

His attempts were futile. He gave up.

 

A slender statue of fruit and mashed potatoes stood in the center of the hall.

 

Good thing it wasn't a statue and it was Hector giving up on life.

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