1 September 2012
The firewhiskey flows and the butterbeer glasses are raised across Europe as another Quidditch World Cup is bought to a close, but the big winners are not so much the Ukranian team, but rather the coffers of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. A historic match between Bulgaria, one of Europe’s favourite teams, and Ukraine, who swung up the charts from nowhere to meet them in the finals, the match drew larger profits than seen in years. Abelard Clagge, the eve
31 July 2012
The Quidditch World Cup draws to a close this weekend when the Bulgarian and Ukrainian teams meet in the highly anticipated final game. The two Slavic juggernauts have dominated the tourney, leaving many favorites in the dust.
After trouncing Denmark in the final eight, the Ukraine reached the final by defeating Peru in a hard fought edge-of-your-seat match. The Ukrainians not only beat Peru, the team favored by many to walk away with the Cup, they shut them
20 June 2012
The workers of Britain’s notorious Knight Bus have gone on strike, leaving hundreds of wizards and witches across the country stranded. Charged with providing the nation’s magical folk with transport in emergency situations, the irresponsible workers are neglecting their duties in a ploy to augment their salaries.
“It’s downright meager what they pays me and Ernie,” opined Mr Stan Shunpike of south London, conductor of the Knight Bus. “I can hardly afford a pint o’ al
16 May 2012
Dunderly Clagge, nephew of Abelard Clagge, Minister of Magic, has been reported missing, his location untraceable as of May 15th. The official report, released today, states that Dunderly was holidaying in Wales, failing to return to his family on the 17th, as intended.
The Minister refused to comment, but Mavis Clagge, his sister-in-law, told the Prophet that her son was a lovely young man, and intensely reliable. “I’m so worried,” she weeps, tearing her handkerchief
15 May 2012
Various reports have come in that a renegade group has set itself up on the WWN (Worldwide Wizarding Network), broadcasting derogatory reports about the Ministry of Magic and the traumas faced by our world. This group calls themselves the Podpeople, and they are not to be trusted.
“I love the Podpeople,” says Claudette Bagelle, an annoying nineteen year old girl who the Prophet spoke to on Diagon Alley. “They play the coolest music, and I just love that one gu
29 December 2011
Abelard Clagge, sworn in last month as Minister of Magic, will today announce the new budget. A new year, a new era, and a new economic state. Formerly of the International Magical Trading Standards Body, Clagge is in an ideal position to turn around the stagnant economy. He found a minute to tell the Daily Prophet of the changes.
“Wars do cost money,” he says. “There have been so many extra expenses that we are finding it somewhat difficult … we do what we can.”
28 December 2011
On the 26th of December, as most of us slept off bloated bellies, tiny groups of men and women across the country, wands in hand, were sneaked into the grounds of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The Ministry of Magic is delighted to report that after a reign lasting almost since the very defeat of Lord Voldemort, the ‘new’ Dark Lord has at last met his death.
It is true - peace has come at last, though ministry representatives, including recently appoi