Jump to content
Arwa Hashmi-Andrada

In the muddy water, we're falling

Recommended Posts

Arwa Hashmi-Andrada

It had started with Isobel and Emmett's big scene, and culminated with Simon and Hazel actually getting together (though Arwa had still made fun of @Simon Reed when it was just the trio). Arwa had always known she liked girls - that was the big benefit of growing up in a family where, if it was frowned upon by anyone, she had never seen neither hide nor hair of them. Regardless, it still left the second year with a feeling of vertigo, with hollowed out ears and the whole deal. She had considered sending her parents a letter home, a brief note that lacked explanation, stating "hey guys, I think I'm gay", but the absurdity of it had stopped Arwa's hand from inching any closer to the parchment. What would two gay men tell their potentially lesbian daughter? There would be tons of love and reassurances, but she didn't think that was what she needed.

 

"You wanna go down for a walk?" She asked Aurora, right after breakfast. She had switched house tables for the day, feeling like she would jump out of her skin if she had to sit there and eat all by herself for one more morning. The Slytherin table seemed much more friendlier in comparison (though she really ought to spend more time with her mentee). Once the other girl had agreed to the idea, Arwa had simply smiled and led the way towards the lake.

 

There was something tranquil about this part of the castle that allowed Arwa to clear her mind.

 

"Do you..." she started, before trailing off, chewing at a hang nail on her thumb. She looked sideways at Aurora before opening her mouth, once again. "You know the whole...thing with like...Hazel and Simon?" She didn't mention Emmett and Isobel; no one was sure what that was even about at this point, and it probably wouldn't even help her case. "What do you think about that?" She asked, instead. This was way harder than she had expected it to be.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Aurora Andrews

Aurora's curiosity had been peaked the minute Arwa had joined her table for breakfast so naturally she agreed to her friend's proposal. The redhead couldn't be sure what had brought it all on, but she ambled alongside her friend as they headed outside. She suspected from the demeanour of her friend that this was something of a serious nature, and the curiosity was bubbling to the surface, begging to have her questions answered, so she forcefully pushed all of it down until Arwa could get whatever was on her chest off.

 

After all, she didn't think they'd really had a walk outside on the random before.

 

Aurora paused as soon as Arwa finished speaking, trying to figure out quite what exactly her friend had meant by that. What about Simon and Hazel? Was she suppose to have feelings about that exclusively because of Simon being her best friend? She was already busy trying to figure out if she wasn't allowed to hold Simon's hand anymore, and what about hugs for that matter? Aurora honestly wasn't sure what she felt about it if she was being honest but in no shape or form had any interest in delving into that and less she find out more than she bargained for. 

 

The redhead was much better off ignoring any kind of feelings.

 

Feelings were messy.

 

Obviously.

 

And this wasn't suppose to be about her anyways.

 

"Well... what exactly about them?" Aurora hesitantly questioned, hoping to get more understanding on where this was leading. Something in her knew that whatever Arwa wanted to talk about was probably not directly about them.

 

Unless she suddenly fancied one of the two.

 

Then okay that would be a problem.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Arwa Hashmi-Andrada

Perhaps the problem was that Arwa didn't really exist in tandem with the rest of her year. She was just there by coincidence, and on top of that, she had been sorted into Gryffindor, far away from Julian. She would occasionally curse the Sorting Hat for briefly mentioning Ravenclaw and then shafting her off to a completely different house. It had left her feeling completely isolated, and beyond that, she felt like she had no one to turn to. It was a good thing she had Aurora, then - it was so incredibly easy to talk to her, that Arwa sometimes felt like she had known the other girl since they were both very young.

 

This was probably what soulmates felt like.

 

"Well," she started, trying to get the words out of her mouth and into the air between them. "You know how Hazel really seems to like Simon?" Like, really, really; Arwa didn't think she had ever seen anyone so into another person, except maybe her own parents (she wondered if she ought to blame Ryan and Nadir for giving her such delusions of love and devotion). "Have you ever thought of a...boy like that?" She asked, wrinkling her nose.

 

There it was; finally, the truth.

 

Her hands were fidgeting in her lap, waiting desperately for Aurora's reaction. She didn't think the Slytherin would be upset with her, but the anxiety churning inside her stomach and the air that seemed all too eager to crush her lungs was telling her a completely different story. Instead, it was telling her to get up and run the other way.

 

The one thing she didn't mention was the fact that she'd had a crush on Hazel until a few days ago - she was just so pretty and nice - because Simon was her friend and she would never do that to him. The only thing she needed to do in that moment was to try to figure out what was going on in her own head - and without sending her dads a letter filled with questioning scribbles.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Aurora Andrews

Aurora nodded along with Arwa, definitely in the agreement of how much Hazel liked Simon and vice versa. She didn't know if she'd ever seen two people so infatuated with one another, particularly at their age but she'd also not put much thought in the subject. The redhead didn't know if she had ever seen so much drama unfold between two people either, if fancying other people involved that much theatrics, she wasn't so sure of her preparedness to handle such things. Plus, the fact that Aurora herself was trying to deal with having to let the reins go with her best friend, and dealing with the resounding jealousy that surrounded the whole thing, the petite girl couldn't imagine adding anything extra to the mix.

 

Friendships were difficult enough as it was, thanks.

 

But Arwa's next question did throw her off.

 

"Oh. Um. No." The redhead stumbled out.

 

"I... I mean I don't exactly interact much with anyone outside of Simon to be honest and well that would be complicated at best."

 

Not that Aurora thought about that.

 

Ever.

 

But the subject seemed to be headed a certain way and Aurora was just clever enough to figure it out.

 

"Arwa... do you... do you fancy girls? I mean it's okay if you do. Girls are great. I mean I'm one and I think I'm pretty awesome."

 

Aurora chuckled briefly before continuing on.

 

"I mean, my quid captain Abby has a fiancée and she was probably the most amazing person ever, and so pretty. She called me princess."

 

Aurora's face went red as she realized she was rambling about her ex-quid captain.

 

"My point is, it's totally okay. You can trust me."

Edited by Aurora Andrews

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Arwa Hashmi-Andrada

The moment that Arwa had been waiting for came far too soon. It was possible that she had underestimated how much Aurora actually knew her - which was evidently quite a lot. The way Arwa had attempted to conceal her words behind a curtain of pure inquisitivness was obviously not enough. It was a terrifying feeling, and one that left her mouth gaping and stuck on a rapid blink.

 

“Yeah, I don’t exactly have a crush on Julian,” she said, haltingly, referring to Aurora’s earlier words; she wasn’t avoiding the actual question. Arwa felt like she needed to address all sides of the situation. If she’d known Julian for so long, it only made sense for her to have some sort of feelings for him, right? It was a crude way to measure their friendship, but Arwa felt like she needed to weigh it, nonetheless.

 

She turned her head towards the lake, staring wistfully at the water. Arwa took a moment, then another, before she finally found the courage to face Aurora again. “I do,” she said in a small voice. “You’re the best, you know that?,” she smiled softly. If she had to choose between anything else and Aurora, she knew what she would pick.

 

“That sounds awesome,” she replied, a grin finally breaking out onto her face. “I remember her,” she nodded. Vaguely, but Arwa remembered the tall girl at a match or two. Maybe she ought to have approached and befriended her - maybe then, there wouldn’t be so much confusion bubbling up inside of her. She sighed, and squinted.

 

”I guess it’s just really scary,” she said, finally. “And with my dads, I feel like I can’t tell them it’s scary because they might...I dunno, except me to already be okay with this,” she shrugged. It was something Arwa hadn’t even admitted to herself, and yet, here she was, letting it flood out into the open. She wondered if she was being unjust here; more than anyone, Ryan and Nadir would know how this felt, but Arwa had always been afraid of breaking the hearts of those she loved most.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Aurora Andrews

Initially, Aurora had worried she might have overstep her boundaries with her friend. It was obvious to the redhead immediately that the subject had made Arwa nervous, uncomfortable even, considering the way she had approached her. So, when her friend didn't respond at first and looked away, Aurora had already thought up and immediate apology for her friend. After all, Arwa was one of the most important people in her life, the last thing she wanted to do was upset her, or disrupt their friendship.

 

So, the deep sigh of relief she desperately hoped Arwa hadn't caught once she finally spoke, thankfully disproved her concerns. A warm smile graced the petite girl's face at her friend, after all her own track record for dealing with her feelings had lately led her to think she wouldn't know how to say the right thing anymore. She'd almost lost a friendship in her first year and she wasn't looking for that to repeat itself.

 

At Arwa's last words, the redhead could sense the hesitation in her friend's voice, and immediately reached out for her hands, grasping them tightly in her own. She always found it a source of comfort for herself, and felt it was the best way to convey her feelings towards Arwa. She gave them a gentle squeeze for extra assurance.

 

"Well, no matter what you know you've got me right here at your side. Don't forget that, okay?" The redhead hesitated briefly.

 

"And, realizing something like this is a big deal and scary but I'm sure your dads experienced similar feelings when they were younger too. Maybe they'll be more accepting of your hesitation, and uncertainty than you think. It's okay not to be okay right now."

 

Aurora smiled at her friend, giving another squeeze of assurance.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

×

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.